Second cancer initiation

My revelations so far

Last Monday on 24th of July 2023, I received the diagnosis of breast cancer relapse. Many tests followed to check if it has spread into the brain, bones, liver, lymphs, via blood.

Next week on Wednesday, the 2. August at 11am, I will receive the results and suggestions for treatments. 

During the treatments briefly after the diagnosis Jesus Christ and Angels appeared and ony after one week so many revelations occured that I started to write about on my private Facebook page and on instagram.

Here are some snippets. My life has comepletely changed once again, and so will this Soulletter to communicate with you on my thread. At the moment, I don't feel like posting weekly Beregini and Runes Readings but am making space for this new initiation and what it may bring.

Monday, 24/7/2023: Today I got biopsy results of cancer recurrence. I already had blood test and MRI of the skeleton.Tomorrow it continues with CTs of the abdomen and brain and on Wednesday thorax. Now I hope that it has not spread. I feel completely at peace no matter what. I have felt such a strong presence of angels and Jesus and see this as an invitation to connect more closely with these energies.And straight away the Daily Om Course with the Angels came to me. And I will read the gospels to get to know Jesus better. Thank you for your positive energies and prayers and please no tips etc.I will approach you myself if I need anything.
 

Tuesday, 25/7/2023: Another day with lots of tests in the stomach and brain for metastases is over. I saw another angel in human form today.A staff member who wished me bon appétit with the brightest eyes and most beautiful smile.It warms my heart to think of it.
Furthermore, I started to read the Gospels today and feel particularly drawn to John the Baptiste.I am the only one who was baptised after we moved from Kazakhstan to Germany.But I never followed the Christian path. I feel I am being baptised as an adult with my conscious grown up choice to let in Jesus and Spirit into my life now with the second cancer diagnosis.It helps me to fully surrender, no matter where this new cancer initiation is taking me. I feel the first cancer journey was a deep reconnection with the Great Mother and my body and now it is the Father Spirit and his son opening their arms towards me.It is like the path of trinity and transcendence weaving through me of body,Soul and Spirit all united. I am deeply humbled and feel so loved.

Wednesday, 27/7/2023: My son turned 14 today!!! Another seven years rite of passage begins. I am glad he is currently in Morocco and celebrating with his big dad's family while I am undergoing tests for metastases spreading or not. In that way he can enjoy himself and not being so worried with such young years. While I have already embraced death fully through my first breast cancer diagnosis, seeing loved ones so worried and esp. my own and only son is almost unbearable.He is my biggest gift and reason to live and I will not give up hope as long as I can.

Thursday, 27/7/2023: After last three days full of tests whether cancer relapse has metastasized, I enjoyed going back to work. I love my job of organising cultural events for disabled people. A nice puposeful change of scenary to hospital while waiting for results and treatment suggestions next Wednesday.
Since Jesus' presence has shown up so strongly since last Monday, I keep communicating and connecting with him. Today I received a gift of wisdom about the 'Lamb of God'. Jesus is called like that by John the Baptiste as a living sacrifice for our sins.I don't resonate with the concept of 'sin' albeit nobody in human form is perfect and we are all flawed. However, when I connected with Jesus and asked him about sins and diseases like my second cancer diagnosis and why he offered me the sign of the lamb, he answered it is all about true surrender and sacrifice of all proclaimed expectations and identity constructs.
You see, I am a double aries starsign and a Nr. 33/6 in numerology.That is all about being a visionary and a go getter,full of passion and fighty spirit.While I very well associate with those traits,my first cancer initiation aleady taught me to let go of all perceptions and expectations and to become a no body,an aries (lamb) beyond any identity constructs. But I still saw this dis-ease as an initiation to the underworld and back of turning demons into diamonds.I was able to speak to my demons of tumor and metastases.It was still a lot in the doing mode and focusing on writing a book about it. Still founded on some sort of an identity of a wounded healer.
This time it is different, I don't feel like transmuting anything,it is like being this Lamb of God, simply surrendering and saying: "Take me God and use me for your highest good!" And it feels peaceful and liberating and full of trust. A very new experience of completely letting go and be filled by grace.
And almost instantly, I listened to Richard Rudd's teachings about the Corpus Christi and the Rainbow Body and Dirk Schneider 's book 'Jesus Christ Quantumphysist'.I am listening and following the 'signs' that speak to me. Every life experience is such a good teacher and it really isn't about any results but the journey. My high achiever doer Aries Lamb type is truly dying bit by bit here....

Saturday, 29/7/2023: I have started to paint one of my Guardian Angels Michael and reading about the Seven Seals and Corpus Christi by Richard Rudd. In the book Archangel Michael is also connected to Shambhala and Kalachakra that I was initiated into on my first cancer healing journey. So many wonderful new revelations and it goes wider and deeper on this second cancer quest.